Curious. Humble. Committed to Change

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This week I have been involved in ceremony work with men. I am deeply moved by the love and tenderness that is opening up among us. It is certainly exceptional. It is quite rare for men to express care and affection for each other in the ways that I have witnessed in these spaces. It is deep personal work that truly matters.

We need to work on the way patriarchy shapes our inner lives, our emotional lives, our capacity to be with each other in authentic and vulnerable ways.

At the same time, and this is why adrienne’s piece is so helpful, our work must be about reshaping society. About our impact on the people around us. Gabriel Amezcua nails it:

I really believe that it is important to talk about the masculine capacity to be vulnerable, and to create safe spaces where we can be sympathetic to each other and share our emotions. However, the deconstruction of patriarchy requires much more than building an altar for emotional and empathetic men. The work of new masculinities requires a sincere confrontation with the power imbalances between men and women, without feeling uncomfortable to explore the fact that there are places within us from which we exert power without being fully conscious of it. It requires us to be honest about how we exercise control and privilege through being men and, above all, it requires a work of deconstruction of the patriarchal attitudes that we take for granted in our daily life: extraction, projection, competitiveness, colonization, domination, etc.

It is my hope that we can co-create a space that invites the fullness of ourselves. A space where we can practice a more open, more empathic masculinity. But also a space that concerns itself with power, and with the impact of patriarchy in our society. It is my hope that we can do this with humility. Without getting into the tired tropes of performative wokeness. 

Curious. Humble. Committed to changing ourselves and to supporting each other.

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