Sometime ago I was invited into a conversation on Men, Psychedelics and Trauma. And now Pascal invited me back to dive more deeply into a conversation about my approach to healing work and thoughts on psychedelics.
Here I talk some about how the story of healing can itself become a trap. I share some of my own growth, as I learn to find the divine in the mundanity of everyday rather than only to seek it in the ecstatic experience.
Read MoreI am always having conversations about finding the best ways to bring amazing people together. Sooner or later we end up with us talking about festivals.
Festivals are these “temporary autonomous zones” where music, art, and culture are at the very center of our shared experience. It is where we get to experiment with different ways of being together.
They elicit the transcendent, the joyful, the effervescent, and the collective. Something remarkable happens in these waters.
Read MoreToday I am writing about both, struggling with addiction and how to deal with being in relationship with someone who is an addict.
This one is particularly personal for me. I am on my own journey toward sobriety. In this process, I am learning that giving voice to the parts we want to hide, the things that we are ashamed of, is the most important part of getting free of the shame that keeps us in bondage. Speaking openly about what we tend to hide grows our capacity to heal from what is holding us back.
These ailments are part of the human condition. They have been with us forever. But how we deal with them has been different across time, societies, and cultures.
Read MoreTrigger Warning: This newsletter is about childhood sexual abuse.
I want to invite us to build a culture that talks frequently and openly about childhood sexual abuse.
I am not a victim myself. But in my healing practice, as well as in my role as friend, partner, coach, and spiritual confidant, I am baffled by the number of people who have experienced this horrific form of childhood trauma.
“The US Centers for Disease Control estimates 20% of all adults experience rape or sexual abuse by an older child or adult by the age of 18.”
One of the reasons why sexual abuse keeps happening to children is precisely because we have a culture that allows it to happen but forbids us to talk about it. It is a prevalent form of abuse. But we keep it buried deep in the shadows. Victims are often overcome with a paralyzing sense of shame and isolation. They feel like their lives and livelihood would be at risk if they tell someone about their experience. They worry that they will not be accepted or believed.
tl/dr: I offer my reflections on a column rich with helpful ways to contend with the depression of a loved one. Then I offer thoughts on how to face the depression epidemic from the perspective of culture and community. I include thoughts on the promise of psychedelics.
Read MoreIn early December I shared “The Lie of the Butterfly” with you. Tuesday Ryan-Hart’s piece on the discomforts of transformation. Today I’m sharing her follow-up piece, A Crystal Ball of Contradictions, “six things to do to bring clarity in the midst of contradictions.”
Read MoreOne of my goals this year is to share more of my own sense-making. I want to take what I am learning, the ideas and practices that are turning me on, and find the best ways to share them with you.
I see this work as a sort of translation. It means taking ideas from other sources and finding a way to connect them to this broader project that we are a part of.
By “we,” I mean “YOU and me” and the others who give time and attention to this newsletter. And my other offerings.
We are part of something.
Read MoreCoaching has become one of the most rewarding parts of my work. It is not all I do. But it is one of the strongest levers for transformation that I have yet to find.
My coaching work is evolving. It is changing and deepening.
Originally, my focus was on leaders navigating the endless waves of VUCA.
Volatility. Uncertainty. Complexity. Ambiguity.
On people contending with a growing culture of grievance and hypersensitivity. A work culture that seems to question the very existence of leadership itself.
Read More“The metaphor of the butterfly seems to be the perfect metaphor for our transformation fable…
But I’ve recently entered that chrysalis - I haven’t emerged yet and I have to tell you nothing feels normal or natural or evolutionary about it. It feels hard. And scary. And uncertain. And I DO NOT THINK MY CELLS KNOW HOW TO DO THIS.
So mostly I’ve been surviving.
My training as a social worker, my loving and supportive family, and my spiritual practices did not prepare me for this level of uncertainty. This feeling like I am falling and, while I’m scared to hit the ground, I’m also not exactly sure there is a ground to hit. It is the most untethered I have been in my life, and I do not like it.”
Tuesday Ryan-Hart is my fiancé, she is the love of my life. She is my confidant and often my guide. She is one of the most courageous people I know. She wrote this short piece, and I just had to share it with you: The Lie of the Butterfly, and 4 Tips as Everything Dissolves.
Read MoreBOOST Your Practice is one of my favorite programs. A lot of you have joined me over the years. You’ve been asking for it. I hope to see you back!
And if you’ve never done it, this is the year for you to join.
New Year’s Resolutions don’t work.
Mutual accountability works.
I’m inviting you to BOOST Your Practice with us
Read More
